I certainly was not aware how lack of sleep is that serious till last night... when i finally threw in the towel that this is a problem... Poor Shwu yun, she was my first target of the night... the first person i sms-ed to seeking help cause i could not enter into any sleep at all no matter how hard i tried to close my eyes...
Next target on list was uncle zack, but i simply forgot that he told me he will be away to Genting on April's fool day... But he replied me any way, hahaz, just that dun want him to waste money on such sms-es so i never replied him... i wanted to go down and take my laptop up to use but thought it would be a waste of my effort walking up and down... a wrong decision... didn't managed to sleep at all till 4 plus, i thought i better try again... this time it was like a few minutes flip one time, then wake up then sleep a while, so in the end still 5 plus woke up... Gave up trying... went to bath to wake myself up a little, find out what's bothering me and what's the problem...
Thought that though in the day I might be laughing and smiling but deep inside it's real torture, cause of the uncertainty in life.. i'm not sure what i want now, don't get any news from any university applied and end results? DON't Even know i can find a job or not... Internal stress, when night falls, it became real deep self reflection as there are no one around you whom you can chat with and forget everything... Every day just seems to pass so quickly that i find nothing to look forward to.. =(
I don't know what i want already!! Urghs
Labels: Upset with life
